28th September 2017 Just egging them on.

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Thursday 28th 54-60F, 12C, cloudy, light wind with a rainy day forecast. Five, large birds of prey were spiraling upwards above a copse. Slightly too far away to be sure whether they were Red Kites but they had the same features. The peasants are practicing their stealth maneuvers between copses in readiness for the 1st October. A dozen or so of these birds are a regular sight wandering jerkily about together. A van had to slow and beep his horn as one gaudy male took to the main road as his harem dutifully followed.

Pheasants are not remotely the brightest of creatures. They have the same habit as hares and will run [forever] straight down the middle of the road even when there is no hindrance on the verges. Both will cheerfully cross the road to the illusion of greater safety even when they were perfectly safe on the opposite verge. There are numerous compounds in the woods and copses where hundreds of pheasants are raised. Usually in the company of a few, caged chickens.

I have often wondered whether their are pheasant egg farms. How else would the hunters have access to many thousands of young? Of course there are! Hunter's cannon fodder must be a nice sideline for pheasant pluckers who produce the birds for food. I am not particularly against shooting but wish they'd do it more quietly! It can be terrifying to be riding along, minding my own business, only a for a gun to go off, close by, without any warning!

The upside is that the Danish countryside is obviously managed for shooting. So many small copses and tree-lined, field ponds would probably vanish otherwise. It all adds to the beauty of the countryside whatever one may think about shooting something warm and fuzzy just for sport. No doubt it helps keep the rural social life going as well. Just a short walk around and across the stubble fields. It hardly rained all day but I was too busy for  ride.

Friday 29th 55-60F, 13C, light wind and heavy overcast with a damp start promised. Short walk. Rather cool with spots of rain in the air. It stayed dry for a ride of 13miles along the main roads. There was no other sensible route to my intended goal. Going well despite the easterly wind.

Saturday 30th 53F-12C, dark grey and windy form the east again. All day rain is forecast. 

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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26th September 2017 Surely not, again?

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Tuesday 26th 56-60F, 13-15C, damp, heavy grey overcast and quite windy. A quiet walk along the lanes. A busy day at home so no ride.

The UN is investigating Denmark for breaking global sanctions against the use of North Korean forced labour to build their latest, coal-fired battleship. The profits from the ship building are known to go straight to North Korea's nuclear weapons research according to one UN spokesman.

This verge trimmer had two independent mowers. Requiring some skill to work around signposts and other obstacles without losing its steady walking pace.

Wednesday 27th 56F, 13C, slightly misty, heavy grey overcast and quite windy. From now on I shall refer to my shopping rides as going to get ripped off by the danish supermarket chains. Without being paranoid it is obvious the system is set up for massive theft by the supermarkets. A complete lack of staff usually means a young teenager on the checkout is the only visible staff member.

Items are either not priced or are showing the wrong price compared with the bar code reader at the checkout. The belts at the checkouts are deliberately made short on both sides of the till to ensure the shopper has absolutely no chance in hell of having time to read the tiny print on the receipt. The shopper is too busy racing to put away their shopping as the queue inevitably lengthens. Because that is how the system works and is fine tuned to work precisely that way by the supermarkets.

There is usually nowhere to put down shopping bags while the receipt can be read unless one has a trolley. Many prefer a handheld basket when shopping for fewer items. The checkout staff always ask if a receipt is required. Many shoppers can't be bothered. To their own detriment, as they are more likely to be ripped off through ignorance of the charges for the items they just bought. They use a clever system where the full price of a reduced item is listed and then the discount shown below. This is deliberately designed to confuse the shopper. Who must do a double take before moving on down the list.

The staff often have no idea of the cost of items where a price label is not displayed and there are always unmarked items. I was told by a young teenager that both options of one product were the same, low price, but was then charged double at the checkout for the unmarked option. It occurs far too often that any item on special offer is literally removed from the shelves, or fridges and only returns after the end of the offer. This suggests that the manufacturer is paying for an offer which never transpires. It still seems very odd, to me, that a country in the EU has no consumer protection at all and only three chains of supermarket but using different trade names.

I took advantage of the stubble fields yet again to explore new viewpoints and capture fresh landscapes. I managed 56 images in all, thanks to my attempts to reach the same deer which has been grazing out on the prairies for several days now. It dashed off just as I reached the limits of my modest zoom lens. [Misty woods top left]

Not much later I found another deer resting in a hollow. It rose to its feet and we stared each other out. As I advanced a few steps at a time and took numerous snaps. The ground was remarkably dry this morning instead of the usual heavy dew. Even where the fields had been pig's muck sprayed it was firm underfoot.

A wealthy landowner has been accused of setting pigeons as live bait to catch birds of prey in traps to increase his profits from shooting on his land. He denies knowing anything about it. I wonder if he has Scots ancestry? No ride today.

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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25th September 2017 Surely not?

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Monday 25th 55F, 13C, grey and windy.

Latest Danish headlines: Denmark's 5th, coal-fired battleship was built by North Korean, forced labour! That would be like suggesting that Hitler used forced labour to build the Ark Royal. This is just so wrong, on so many levels, I really don't know where to start. So I'd better not. 😇

The second story was about whether the AGW-Free, Danish coalition government would have an excuse to rip up all the windmills in Denmark. This was after three hours of dead calm stalled every single wind turbine in Denmark. A new record and ABSOLUTE PROOF of a LACK OF global warming.

Just think, if they'd allowed a large fleet of electric cars to exist in Denmark, by now, the unexpected lull could have been safely overcome by storage. The car's batteries could have fed back to all the Danish architect-designed toasters, architect-designed espresso coffee machines and iPlods if anyone had actually thought it through in advance.

Instead of which they all threw themselves on the ground and wailed about the crippling lack of wind power undermining Danish standards of living. And being thrown back into the Dark Ages of Benign Socialism and unfair equality.

Talking of storm tossed seas...

I bet the "powers that be" are already plotting another [Danish architect designed] coal-fired power station. To be run on North Korean coal, shoveled into the boilers by forced labour from North Korea! Surely not?

Methinks it is time for another walk amongst the morning, dodgem cars. Four drivers tried but failed to fell me. I walked a familiar route which I ration for myself to avoid over-familiarity. Well away from any roads it is a rare, unspoilt, rural, public footpath.

It finally descends very steeply to the outskirts of a village with pretty trees and well kept gardens. There I joined a quiet lane to walk back to the main road and the usual mayhem. When I glanced across to "my" usual dark woods, I saw a stag standing rigidly to attention. It was right out in the middle of the still half-ploughed prairie posing like a statue. Elsewhere, tractors toiled tirelessly on the steeply sloping fields. Probably aiming to wrench the most crops out of the badly undulating landscape to fulfill the demands of the EU dictatorship.

I'm hoping to be allowed out later if GLS can manage to deliver my parcel, only 10 miles in three days, to the pickup point. This, after waiting for weeks for the online dealer to get their act in gear. Throughout which extended time, it has clung grimly to its completely and utterly fraudulent, "2-5 days delivery" on its website. That's the problem with having no consumer protection in Denmark.. Late morning ride to the shops to be ripped off. Parcel safely collected. 7 miles.

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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23rd September 2017 Rural bliss!

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Saturday 23rd 53-60F, 12-15C, calm, bright and sunny.  The wind turbines were struggling to get started on flat batteries. Today was practice day for a driving 'dotard' who really ought not to be doing so any more. He approached along the straight with his inside wheels only a foot from the verge. With no obvious intention on his part to go out around me I jumped into the long grass to save my own life. His expression and fixed g[l]aze never altered. As he continued on his way like some cruise missile with a badly broken guidance system.

Further on, the roads were plastered in mud. The local farmer obviously thinks the public highway is where one turns one's tractor at the end of each furrow when ploughing the chocolate stuff.

Later still, the usual 'nutter' in his Mercedes two-seater came around a blind corner with what is usually described as "considerable enthusiasm." It can only be a matter of time before something vulnerable, or immovable, is blocking his path. In the interests of fairness one can only hope for the latter.

A dozen or more pheasants were tentatively crossing the field between two copses. At the sight of my good self they scattered in assorted directions. They really ought to elect a strong leader to keep things under control at times like these.

I was allowed out for my familiar Saturday morning ride. Going quite well and cruising at between 16 and 18mph on the way there. A couple of fit young chaps on their carbon steeds went past on the way back. Later I passed them as they dawdled beside the road. Then I was overtaken again. The home-made, Outboard, 40 liter saddlebag is really proving its worth. 15 miles.

Sunday 24th 56-60F,13-15C, heavy overcast and still. A potentially damp start is forecast but brighter later. My walk took me slightly further afield than usual along a quiet farm track to woods and ponds. Probably in excess of one hundred and fifty sparrows were moving like a swarm of bees along the hedgerows. A deer popped out and wandered along without realizing I was there. Lots of pheasants to be seen again. Busy again, so no ride today.

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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22nd September 2017 Words, not indeed.

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Friday 22nd 49-58F, 9-15C, slightly misty, very light breeze and bright. It should be a better day today . 

Continuing on yesterday's green theme: Y'all couldn't make it up! The Danish, right wing, coalition government is decreasing registration taxes on large and luxury cars by roughly £5000-6000 [equivalent] but increasing taxes on small cars. The smaller the car the more it will cost extra. No mention of electric cars or hybrids in the news article. Woohoo! Abandon hope of any CO2 reduction from this lot. 

They were only elected in a desperate bid to end the socialist's open door immigration policy. But have assumed the mantle of having a mandate for building inequality. Owners of homes in the major cities are enjoying a massive boom and have built wine cellars with tax breaks on home improvements. Normal people's homes are unsaleable, uninsulated, unheatable and falling down in the countryside. 

Meanwhile immigrant gangs are having cowboy shooting matches in major Danish city streets over their drugs sales turfs. And, there are hundreds of sentenced, immigrant criminals with prison records and deportation notices, but still no ticket home.

The winding track across the half sewn prairie seen from the ridge above.

When I came to Denmark I was told by a wise man that one should always judge a person on their actions. Rather than their words. Welcome to The Dark Green Climate Friendly Asylum  Elysium. It could be worse. I could still be living in Gravely Blighted! And nobody wants that. 😊

My walk in warm autumn sunshine took an anticlockwise turn around the edges of stubble fields.  I watched several large birds of prey going about their business.

It seems some lunatic used a long banned agricultural chemical to kill a family of Red Kites in Jutland. A harmless but impressive bird which clears up the countryside of animal corpses apparently. It is protected in Denmark, except from brain dead fuckwits. The latest news is that many long-banned chemicals are pouring out of the horticultural grower's greenhouses into the Danish water courses.

A smart little warbler was looking for snacks in a hedge and came within a few feet of me. Just as I thought I might get a quick snap with my camera it went off to find another hedge. Several groups of deer were relaxing in the fields and enjoying the sunshine. A pair of young kept their heads down in a dip only a few yards away, as the mother dashed off. Presumably to draw my attention away. Later, all three were watching me intently, from afar, before bounding back into the forest. No ride today.

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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21st September 2017 Dark Green Messiah?

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Thursday 21st 54F, 12C, heavy overcast, calm, with light showers possible. 

Fyn [the central island of Denmark's three land masses] has been voted the best cycling area in Denmark. Ironically the article showed the picturesque, winding causeway to a local peninsula which is routinely used as a racetrack by drivers in both directions. Riding bicycles two abreast, as shown in the article's illustration, would be completely suicidal! BTW: There is no cycle lane in either direction on the narrow causeway.

Danish MPs are raising questions about their own Prime Minister after his attempt to paint roller himself as a Green Messiah at the UN: His tenure has seen the abandonment of many long established "green" policies and the closure of important monitoring institutions and records. Not to mention completely freezing electric cars out of the Danish market with savage registration taxes. With his support [and theirs] farmers now enjoy far greater freedom to despoil the countryside and greatly increase the risk to coastal seas and waterways than ever before.

Meanwhile, Denmark's CO2 release increased in 2016 despite empty promises to curb CO2 to former/historical levels at important international conferences. That'll be all the dirty diesel cars they still encourage via taxation and fuel subsidies, the increase in legal road speeds and the coal fired power stations. The short-lived bout of massive subsidies to the middle classes, for solar panel installation, has ended. So there was never any 'trickle down' to the working classes. It's like hybrid cars. There are so few on the roads that it's all a tiny drop in the ocean of CO2 belching from "green" Denmark.  

I was actually quite shocked to discover there is a Danish Minister of the Environment. I can't image he can find much to do each day. Though no doubt his office is truly palatial and impossible to heat efficiently. The Environment post is probably considered a "dirty" starter job for very junior politicians to get a first step onto the gravy train. With the promise of better things provided they don't attract too much negative publicity. 

This week's negative publicity? Strangely "forgotten" [now highly illegal] farm toxins seeping down [untested!] into the deep wells which supply 99.6% of Denmark's drinking water. Now reaching levels several times the legal limit and now we are told, microplastics are found in Danish drinking water. Burp! 

Another day of showers possible with the vague promise of better things later. Time for a walk. Wish me luck! A driver on his phone nearly hit me yesterday as he cut sharply across a blind corner with one hand on the wheel. 

I turned and gave him my [now infamous] replace the handset sign but he waved dismissively as he glanced in his rear view mirror. Don't these chumps realise that hitting a pedestrian in a bright orange coat would delay their journey by several moments unless they used the familiar SMIDSY + hit and run tactic. Though that would require a lack of witnesses. So there is still a very slight risk of his being identified as the killer perp. Perhaps the orange "rag" flapping from his windscreen wiper would give him away? One can but hope. Posthumously of course. 😉

I didn't have to wait for the first blind corner today. Several cars were following a builder's van too closely. So that they missed that he had changed his course by about a foot to brush past me. There was no oncoming traffic but they all still clung to their track like the demented morons they really are. There is no passing place for three miles in the direction they were going. Solid double white lines until the next village and then 30, 25 and 20mph speed limits.

It seems my bright orange, secondhand, Helly Hansen jacket has become part of the scenery. So that I am now totally invisible. [And don't call me Harry Potter!]  Particularly to those practicing Hollywood-style, presidential convoys. Only when I waved my arms frantically did they jerk away from me at the very last moment. May one use the term "retards" in the derogatory sense these days? Always the speeding brain surgeon, these commuters. Never the cleaner.

I left the road as soon as possible and headed for the woods along the soggy and muddy track. There I found neat stacks of logs and even more mud. I branched off uphill and cut through the woods to the boundary. Where I could walk freely across large fields of damp stubble.

Later on I paused to watch a Red kite through my binoculars. It was circling low in search of breakfast but seemed unperturbed by my presence. There was not enough wind for soaring. So there was quite a bit of flapping of its long, dark tipped, 'fingered' wings. Bird watchers, who live in Scotland, will just have to imagine these gorgeous birds. While they wait, for a millennium or two, until their billionaire absentee landlords stop poisoning birds of prey for a fatter profit from investment banker <cough> huntsmen with too much time and other people's losses on their hands. 

A cat sitting just below the circling Kite bolted when it woke from hunting mode. They must go into such a concentrated state of mind that they miss contact with what is going on around them. Just like many drivers! Several deer moved along the field hedges. Or dived through them when they spotted me from hundreds of yards away. So my tatty sailing jacket is not a cheap, Harry Potter invisibility rip-off, after all.

I was allowed out, in the late afternoon, to fetch the shopping. Unnecessary CO2 leakage minimal. Only 7 miles.

Click on any image for an enlargement. 

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20th September 2017: "London cyclist mown down by Kerb Lemming phoning furiously!"

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Wednesday 20th 53F, 12C, calm, overcast and wet. Showers forecast [and provided.]

After further consideration, I have decided that my only real complaint against the "furiously riding" London cyclist rests solely on his not having a front brake. And thereby attracting negative publicity for all cyclists following "an unusual accident."

The tragic death of the women involved was a very rare occurrence and very likely entirely her own fault. She stepped out and then reversed back into the UNFORTUNATE cyclist's path. Leaving the cyclist with an intolerable choice COMPOUNDED by his deliberately crap choice of an illegal braking system.

I still believe he could have reduced his speed far more effectively with a decent front brake instead of a uselessly skidding back tyre on a wet road.

Denying that he did not know it was illegal, as well as ridiculously unsafe, is like saying he didn't know whether he needed a saddle or handlebars on his bike.

NO cyclist moving in cycling circles, as he was over several years, is unaware of the legal and safety needs for a front brake. His own choice of machine, to avoid having a front brake, largely resulted in the publicity surrounding the tragedy which unfolded.

His speed at the time was totally and utterly irrelevant provided it was under the legal speed limit. The cyclist has no special duty to dawdle below the local traffic's speed "just in case."

His lack of helmet was an entirely personal choice and not yet a crime against humanity.

His online opinions, in the aftermath, on a lemming who stepped out in front of a cyclist, were as valid any other's. Tragedy aside, he was the "injured" party and had every right to complain! Only in perfect hindsight and sharing normal human sympathy did they seem in rather poor taste. Though still fully understandable and fully justifiable as he had no knowledge of the women's deteriorating condition.

I hope he appeals against his sentence. Not least to undo the "hanging court" proceedings of a universal manslaughter charge brought simply for not having a front brake on a bicycle. Particularly when a pedestrian deliberately casts themselves off the pavement into his path.

The cyclist was riding on the road. NOT on the pavement.

The pedestrian had the choice of using a nearby crossing but chose not to enjoy its far greater safety. That choice resulted in her death. As did her inattention before stepping onto the road where cyclists and vehicles are normally to be expected.

The court finding could be interpreted to mean that no cyclist, anywhere, may safely exceed 14mph in any built-up area without public criticism, media lynch mobs, or even police prosecution. Is such a punishment warranted for all cyclists, everywhere? Even if they have legal and powerful brakes?

In my own youth popular brake blocks were absolutely useless on steel rims in the wet! The brake blocks were still sold. As were the steel rims by "nefarious" cycle shops and manufacturers globally! Would any cyclist today be charged with manslaughter for having steel rims on their bicycle if they had a collision with a suicidal pedestrian?

This cyclist's punishment completely ignores the freedom of the majority of motorists to drive like uncaring sociopaths at 30mph in any built-up area. Without suffering any sanction at all!

If drivers really cared for pedestrians, then they would surely not allow themselves to drive above a walking pace where pedestrians wander? Just in case a mobile phone abuser behaves suicidally.

Think about that aspect for a moment. The chances of being killed by a quiet car, or motorcycle, are far higher than by any breathless cyclist at the same speed. It's all about mass and acceleration of the "victim" in the collision. Shouldn't motorists be required to crawl along rather than the cyclist? Statistics and science both tell us that the cyclist struggles to cause the awful mayhem and serious injuries of any moving vehicle.

Very quiet electric vehicles, motorcycles and millions of bicycles already inhabit roads. Surely the onus is on the pedestrian to behave sensibly rather than playing the Kerb Lemming?

And for cyclists, who must inevitably ride closer to the pavements than most other vehicles, your duty to humanity is simply to have proper brakes. And to pray you don't meet another Kerb Lemming.

Isn't it time that walking on any road, with an active mobile phone, was banned with a hefty fine? What's sauce for the goose is surely sauce for the gander[er.] If a cyclist may not use a mobile phone. And nor may any driver. Then why not demand suicidal Kerb Lemmings follow suit, by an immediate change in the law? Or has the unfortunate cyclist become the new 'N' word under the law?

There is ongoing discussion on finding better ways to prosecute cyclists who ride dangerously enough to cause injury to pedestrians. Still no discussion on penalizing jay walking while using mobile phones. Local councils are responsible for setting road speed limits and signposting. May we look forwards to signs for cyclists to ride at speeds well below vehicle speeds? 

The arrival of near silent, electrically assisted bicycles is going to cause mayhem if they are allowed to travel above walking pace in built up areas. Elderly riders with slow reaction times will be moving as fast as trained athletes.

Training the Kerb Lemmings via costly TV safety campaigns to look out for Tesla boys and girls is very unlikely to have much impact on them. They already know the roads are stuffed to the gills with impatient drivers in their extremely dangerous vehicles. The statistics scream out the warnings that crossing roads is a dangerous sport. Yet still they step into the road with the attention span of a gnat [or Lemming.]

By all means have a £1000 fine or a year in jail, or both, for not having a front brake on a bicycle. But what about the penalty for walking straight into the path of a moving vehicle or bicycle? A posthumous fine? Denial of emergency health care unless they are blocking the traffic?

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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18th September 2017 Kerb Lemmings 'R' Us.

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Monday 18th 42F, 6C, calm with thick mist. Houses 50 yards away are just visible though not clear. The eastern sky looks brighter so there is still hope of some sunshine if the mist clears. Which it did as I walked to the village and back.

A large tractor was busy, somewhere out in the mist, but I couldn't see anything. So I had to content myself with some atmospheric shots of a patiently waiting, fuel tender.

The London idiot who rode a bike without a front brake has been sentenced to 18 months in a young offenders institution. The lady pedestrian, whom he hit with his thick head, received a death sentence, without appeal, or any chance of parole. Her innocent family left uncomprehending and grief stricken by her summary execution.

How many more copycat fuckwits will still claim they didn't know it is illegal to ride on the public roads without a front brake? Why not set a huge automatic fine and automatic crushing of their machines to <cough> fix their attention?

Mark Beaumont from Scotland has just smashed the Round the World cycling record in under 80 days. He needed to average 240 miles per day and set  a new record for most miles cycled in a month as well! One superhero popularizes cycling. Another trashes cycling and breeds cyclist haters. One is a real cyclist. The other a deluded, immature prat. Or not. See below.

 http://www.bbc.co.uk Mark Beaumont smashes round the world record.

Tuesday 19th 50F, 10C, bright but cloudy with a whiff of a breeze. Rain this afternoon. A recent bit of research suggests that electric bikes are good for rider fitness. Provided they still have to pedal to go along it wad found that most riders worked as hard as a battery-free cyclist but went a lot faster. The side effects of "getting out there" compared with sitting in a car or train for a daily commute would seem to be equally beneficial IMO. The extended range on offer to Tesla girls and boys should make many marginal distance commutes far more psychologically manageable.

A knowledgeable person pointed out to me, the other day, that the two young persons on Focus MTBs were actually, electrically assisted. I had no idea electric bikes could be so sleek! Though the weight more closely matches a "human assisted" trike at a not-inconsiderable premium in price! £5K for the top end models @ 22kg suggests some serious progress is still required in battery weight. I could power my own trike with hot air but hydrogen might be more <cough> universally available.

My walk sent me along the track to the woods. Where there was considerable effort going on to plough and resew the prairie. With a pair of large tractors working together on the ploughing. Meanwhile an immodestly sized, seed drill was trundling back and forth further on. Doubled wheels, all around, presumably to reduce ground pressure, seems to be popular around here. I wouldn't want to meet one of these in a narrow lane on my trike!

Click on any image for an enlargement.

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13th September 2017 Storm in a teacup?

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Wednesday 13th 53F, 11C, already windy, heavy overcast with gales and heavy rain forecast. A low will cross Denmark from the UK this evening and overnight with storm force gusts. The Tour of Denmark riders will be expected to cope with high winds here on Fyn. Unlucky for some?

Harridslevgaard Slot. 
[Harridslev Farm Castle near Bogense.]

Here we are after lunch and the rain has been coming down in sheets with the trees thrashing about in the wind. The rain stopped for w while after 4pm and we even had some sunshine. The Danmark Rundt stage was called off after 100km. [about 60miles] due to the foul weather.  No ride for me!

Thursday 14th 52-58F, 11-14C, heavy overcast and calm at first. The wind and heavy rain had restarted and continued well into the night. More showers are expected today but with lighter winds. My cup anemometer is hardly turning at 7.30am with a light northwesterly breeze. I was hoping for a walk but there are rain drops on the windows. Some ducks flew over and The Head Gardener suggested they were looking for somewhere drier.

Smug tabby dreaming in the stubble.

I walked to the village and back to discover the first morning where I could feel the chill air on my hands. It soon passed as I ambled between the sheltering, roadside  hedges with a wary eye on the traffic. Yesterday's storm has kicked off autumn with the roads littered with small twigs and green leaves. The winds were light and it stayed dry. With even a brief glimpse of sunshine through holes punched in the overcast.

Risked a ride to the shops. The sky was blue black ahead as I rode back into a headwind. Soon after I arrived home there was a cloudburst. Only 7 miles.

Friday 15th 50-58F, 10-14C, bright and still at first but showers and wind promised for later. A lovely morning for walk so I headed up the familiar, but well-puddled track to the woods. From there I headed up through the stubble where I came across four medium-sized dear. No monarchs of the glen but they watched me carefully as I crept forwards along the forest boundary. Twenty images later, at full zoom, there was a  loud bark from behind me and the deer scattered back to the woods.

I walked on towards the summit and returned home by circumnavigating the far side of the field. As I descended to leave the field I disturbed a pheasant. Which plodded jerkily off, straight towards a black cat lying in deep grass. Fortunately the battle of wills was short lived and the cat ran flat out back to the safety of its farmyard. No ride today.

Saturday 16th 50F, 10C, heavy overcast, very light breeze but still dry, except underfoot. I walked around a stubble field where I saw a White headed eagle soaring over the edge of the forest. Having followed it out of sight in my binoculars a crow shouted hoarsely/coarsely from a treetop right above me. There followed a conversation on the etiquette of drawing attention to oneself in the middle of a field for no particularly good reason. It glared down at me but did not move off. Probably under strict orders not to leave its observation post. I returned home bemused but with suitably muddied gaiters. A long grey day without a ride.

Sunday 17th 50F 10C, light winds again but with the promise of showers, possibly heavy, with thunder and hail. It remained dry during my walk along the lanes. A wall of low, grey cloud slid rapidly under towering, sunlit cumulus.

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12th September 2017. Out and about.

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Tuesday 12th 56F, 13C, highly variable, windy weather with showers and sunny periods. A meteorological low will cross Denmark with 25m/s, 50+ mph gusts tomorrow. Nice!

It started raining after half a mile but our hero plodded on regardless. The traffic seemed rather light until two articulated lorries brushed the inside verge on blind corners. While yours truly played the acrobatic clown on the steeply sloping grass. Getting killed once is careless. Getting killed twice, in one morning, by two different vehicles, seems almost foolish.

Egeskov Slot. [Oakwood Castle?]

Home of a remarkable transport and agricultural museum and gardens with several mazes. You could spend days there and still not see everything. Luckily I was able to talk our visitor down from any suggestion of taking a "treetop walk!" 

At least it reminds me of my lowly status in relation to vital goods transport's absolute right to unhindered progress to feed the desperately needy. If I gave up my morning walks I might die prematurely anyway. So it's not a win-win situation for wrinkly, rural pedestrians. I could choose to become eccentrically bolshy and demand my right to free passage on The Dronning's [Queen's] Highway. Sadly, I fear my "stand" would not last very long. More likely to be in recumbent mode, I would say.

The rain increased steadily after the turn at the village church and I had to fight to keep my baseball cap in place. Were these things invented by the Wright Bros? Did they skip the chinstrap purely on weight grounds? The wind was gusting strongly from the south, at times, as if to hinder my safe return to Chez Rural Hovel. I kept my left hand modestly cupped over my binoculars to save wetting the eyepieces. It wouldn't do much harm but it does make the views somewhat streaky.

Only part of Egeskov's classic car collection. 

There are also motorcycles galore, mopeds and bicycles in profusion, planes, carts, coaches and agricultural implements to admire. The castle contains many hunting trophies of now extinct animals and birds. Plus the weapons which ensured their untimely demise.

My only real criticism is the placing of information placards on the floors of the vast buildings housing the cars. This makes them almost impossible to read for curious old farts like myself. So I spent much time on one knee holding my reading glasses and peering at poorly lit, multilingual signs to discover the identity of many items on display. Perhaps they should have hired out knee pads at the turnstiles? Or torches? Nobody ever tells you that the ground gets further away with each passing decade! From now on I'm reserving my kneeling for the receiving of knighthoods for the promotion of tricycling and the encouragement of tourism in Denmark. 

Plans are afoot for a shopping ride if only to remind myself how it's done. I have a had a week without practice and may well have lost the knack by now. You have to fit these things in when you can. What with the forecast looking so dire. Though the local shoe shop is probably still safe from marauding looters. This is Denmark, after all.

Mid-afternoon ride was delayed by a cloudburst. Rather windy but blowing diagonally across the road. Nothing else to irritate me as it stayed dry and the traffic must have been giving me a wide berth. Luckily I hadn't forgotten how to tricycle as I took a ramp at a rate of knots on the diagonal. There's nothing straightforward about tricycling. Only 7 miles. The Tour of Denmark breakaway went the wrong way due to a lack of guidance at a crossing. The stage was won by a Dane.

Click on any image for an enlargement. 

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11th September 2017 In the thick of it.

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Monday 11th 54F, 12C, gales with rain. Threat of clearing up to sunny periods with showers.  The rest of the world seems to be having it much worse so we mustn't complain.

Pretty cottage at the Aastrup Sanatorium.

Another cowardly terrorist has thrown a 90lb block off a Danish motorway footbridge. Fortunately, for the cowardly terrorist, they were saved any risk of identification. Because their basic right to privacy, during their [alleged] criminal activity, was ensured by the total lack of security cameras in the public domain.

Police are appealing for witnesses. Presumably there will be none. Because any witnesses, including drivers on the motorway, would be expected to cover their eyes. Just in case they breached the Danish privacy laws by observing alleged criminal activity, including [alleged] terrorism with an [alleged] weapon of mass destruction. Had the block hit a petrol tanker or chemical tanker in a built up area a WMD is not an exaggeration. Witnesses would be wide open to prosecution, under the full weight of the law, if they so much as whispered in their sleep, to reveal any details of what they might have seen.

We have just been out in the car and were being followed, at foolishly close range, by a drunken, senile, drug addled, total raving lunatic in a small car. While I stuck precisely to the speed limit he was climbing all over our rear bumper trying to overtake despite constant oncoming traffic. Eventually he overtook us on double white lines, on the blind brow of a hill and then lost control for a moment in a violent swerve. He then braked hard to a complete standstill to block our path on the main road.

Erholm 'Dorte' Mølle.

After some arm waving he accelerated to illegally high speed through the 30mph [50kph] village which followed. Fortunately, for us, we had no dash cam fitted. Or we would have been in severe trouble with the law for recording such raving lunacy for posterity. One presumes that Danish courts have no provision for video replay during trials. Not even for lunatic WMD terrorist activities.

Meanwhile, Irma shoe-shop looters are huddled together, in police cells, to save themselves from the aftermath of the hurricane.We have been inundated with days of showers and gales but my rather inadequate footwear collection seem to have stabilized at former levels. I don't even own any "trainers." I'm probably too old to need further training in anything useful involving "trainers."

I was reading only the other day that collectable trainers can be as valuable [in intrinsic terms] as modern art. So there's really no more to be said. Except that you can use the canvas of a modern daub as a working surface to change the oil on your car. All without remotely affecting its intrinsic quality. While posh, collectable trainers are apt to rapidly lose their cosmetic value if you crawl under a car while wearing such totally inappropriate tat.

Horne Kirke.  

We arrived just as a wedding party was about to leave the car park [just opposite] for the church service. So had to quickly remind them that we were not their unfortunate, country cousins. As they all advanced in Viking formation to shake hands. It looks as if they had paid extra for the "outdoor arrangements" for party crashers. Which suggests that it was probably as well my pidgin Danish was enough to allay any fears of our joining them for a bit of free nosh and plonk!

Not that I am remotely against the wearing of "trainers." I am long beyond worrying about the subtle messages of juvenile dress code as they search for their ephemeral partnerships for life. Dandies and fops aside, I'm all for a bit of variety in male plumage. My own appearance in my gaudy "Lycra" is hardly a sound recommendation for plagiarism except for its deliberate choice on safety terms. [Sympathy or empathy is a powerful driver.]

If gaudy trainers, preferably with flashing LED lights, should catch on, they may even save the lives of winter joggers in their standard issue, all matt black uniforms. The same might be said for standard issue, all matt black cycle wear for formal evening wear. Are they copying motorcyclist's traditional and completely anonymous, all black racing leathers? Talk about delusions of grandeur! Even the most timid of mopeds can trash any cyclist's wildest aspirations except on an Alpine descent.

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Monday 4th September 2017 The absense of clomp.

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Monday 4th 50F, 10C, calm, sunny. It was calm yesterday on my ride but often felt like a headwind despite my modest 12-16mph average speed. The wind turbines were standing still too so there was no doubt about how little wind there was. A slow worm was resting on the compost heap yesterday afternoon. I've never seen anything move so fast! It swapped ends too quickly to follow and then shot off into the undergrowth.

The wooded marsh seen from the entrance to the forest.

My morning walk took me over the harvested fields to the woods. Where I followed in the tracks of a forest harvester which had just disappeared from view along the main route. I never caught up with it within the distance I cared to reach before turning off on an uphill route. Then it was back along the bare ridge above the familiar landscape but from a slightly more dramatic viewpoint.

A flock of some thirty swallows were gyrating around an ancient oak in the field hedge. They seemed to follow me towards home. As I headed back to the road with my secondhand walking boots wet from the heavy dew. Fortunately they are Eccos and the membrane is still watertight after all this time.

Looking back towards the ridge. 

The membrane in the Salomon boots lasted less than a year and the guarantee replacements much less than that. My feet would instantly feel that horribly cold chill simply from crossing a damp lawn.

Thankfully the Ecco boots have remained comfortable as the toes gently turned up over time. The chances of finding another "as-new" pair in a charity shop, in my size, must be very slim indeed. They lacked in-soles, when I found them for a fiver equivalent, so I just borrowed some from the leaky Salomon pair.

The Eccos are so much nicer and very much quieter to walk in than the stiffer Salomon, but the Eccos are slightly more slippery on wet tarmac. Which is rather odd and took some getting used to. One wonders how they'd cope with damp rock if one were scrambling on cliffs or rocky outcrops in the hills. I remember that Vibram soles were always similarly slippery in my earlier walking and climbing boots. So how they remained in fashion for climbing and walking boots I have absolutely no idea. Local dogs used to bark madly when I clomped past their homes in the Salomons. Not so with the much quieter Eccos.

Late afternoon ride. Headwind going on the tri-bars. Quicker coming back. 12 miles.

Tuesday 5th 55F, 13C, rather overcast with speckled clouds.  Just a short walk. Busy day. No ride.

Wednesday 6th 60F, 16C, heavy overcast with potentially heavy rain on the menu. It was a pretty awful day with gales and cloudbursts.

Thursday 7th 54F, 12C, overcast and breezy. Wet morning followed by drier weather is forecast. In practice it wasn't a bad day at all and comfortable enough to be outside without a jacket. No ride today.

Friday 8th 55F, 13C, windy, heavy overcast with heavy rain. Expected to rain all day today and tomorrow. It brightened up in the afternoon but I was too busy for a ride.

Saturday 9th 55F, 13C, bright with a light breeze but rain forecast for later this morning. Possibly with thunder. Despite the independent TV weather forecast saying it would be fine it rained for most of the day. Only in the later afternoon did it ease off. With a few sunny period between light showers. We should have trusted the DMI forecast. There was patchy mist in the evening.

Sunday 10th 50F, 10C. Bright and clear but with showers forecast again. I haven't been registering the top temperatures of the day but will do so again soon. So, watch this space.

The only known, all-electric car in Denmark. Made in 1920 and still subject to the threat of crippling, annual import taxes to prevent "The Scourge of Electric Vehicles" should it ever take to the roads of Denmark.

Countless Russians will be hideously disappointed to discover that the goal of their planned visits to the [widely advertised] animal brothel in Copenhagen, does not exist. More fake news, Russian media propaganda, to suggest the low moral standards of the EU countries. What the vast numbers of Russian sex tourists will find to do now is a matter of some conjecture. Perhaps the Danes should just remember to keep their pets on a leash and avoid pallid, vodka-soaked, burly men in furs, lurking in shop doorways?

At least we know The Little Mermaid will be safe from their amorous attentions. She's such a cold fish! However, Copenhagen zoo might like to step up its security. The poorly maintained fleets of rusting buses, piled chaotically up against the gates, should be warning enough to bring out the high pressure hoses. I hesitate to use the term "water cannon" in case it starts a new war of words. 😉 Just a short walk in bright sunshine. The wind is picking up.

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Saturday 2nd September 2017 Overboard Duffel/Saddlebag shelf extension.

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Saturday 2nd 48-60?F, 9-16C, ground mist, completely still, with bright sunshine out of a clear blue sky. Walked along the harvester tracks up to the woods as the last of the mist disappeared. Then curved around the edge of the field and back past the marsh to the road. The first deer took one look and vanished into the sweet corn. The ducks were fairly quiet this morning as a mostly brown flotilla sidled around the edges watching me intently.

A second deer was grazing on the last of the track and seemed unconcerned as I walked within 50 yards. I kept snapping away as I walked a few yards and paused. It raised its head looked around and went back to grazing. This went on for a while until it lifted its head again and bolted into the marsh. Too busy for a ride today.

The images show the inexpensive, black plastic, draining board tray cut down to 10" deep as a rack shelf extension. The choice of black, over white or magenta, was my wife's suggestion.

After sawing off the waste area I filed the cut edges smooth to avoid wearing through the bag material. The tray weighs very little indeed but feels sturdy enough for this job. Half a tray is even lighter!

Then I drilled pairs of small holes to just clear the Trykit rack. Three pairs on the front raised rim and two in the sunken corrugations to avoid rubbing the bottom of the bag. The tray fits the Trykit rack to perfection.

I followed up with five, black, zip ties tensioned around the rack tubes to maintain the shelf extension firmly in place.

The corrugations and raised rim should provide an extra degree of stiffness over a flat plate of greater thickness and weight.

The final image shows the lightly stuffed, Overboard Duffel bag in place on the extended rack. I have re-tied the shoe lace which stops the bag shifting sideways. The trike can be literally laid on its side without the bag moving. How's that for a stealthy support system?

The 40 liter Overboard Duffel bag dwarfs any other bag I have tried and can even be filled with its full height to make more space. It is claimed to be completely waterproof even allowing for full immersion.

I hope you will agree that it offers a superbly large, yet compact, smart and high visibility saddlebag for the touring and shopping tricycle owner. It absolutely trashes any of the usual saddlebags for carrying capacity.

It even offers a neat and secure, heavy duty pocket for the Dreadnought Class, Abus-ASBO, Mini-U-lock. With incredibly strong Velcro fastening to avoid loss or casual pilfering. Bright reflective strips adorn the vertical edges of the pocket. There are a further two, flat pockets inside the bag but no internal dividing panels.

I like this lack of obstruction because it offers a large, flat surface area for easily arranging shopping by weight and fragility. Considering it has twice the capacity of the Carradice Camper it cost considerably less and weighs less. I doubt the Overboard bag will last for decades, as do the Carradice bags, but it seems to be holding up well so far.

Sunday 3rd 60-66F,  16-19C, calm with a few sunny periods. No walk today but I was sent to the more distant shops on my trike in still, comfortably warm conditions. I saw several cyclists out training or enjoying the countryside. A bunch of unhappy teenagers were standing around the usually flooded road in their swimming trunks. It seems they wanted to start a water polo team but were to be disappointed by the lack of rain. I detoured on the way back including the biggest local climb. Where I started off at 80rpm but soon got into my stride with a cadence of 92-95rpm and even hit 105 at the top as the hill slowly eased off. Going well again today. 20 miles.

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1st September 2017. Oven-ready cyclists?

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Friday 1st September, 45F, 7C, calm, bright with thin cloud. Slight risk of showers. Well, at least I remembered to change the month in the heading this time. So I must be running on all cylinders for a change. Though I thought I'd lost it yesterday when the teeny teenager on the supermarket checkout gave me 10 Pall Mall. When I'd actually asked for paracetamol. I haven't seen a policeman in several years so can't really say whether they seem any younger to me. That used to be the litmus test in Gravely Blighted.  Where there are more policemen than people. Probably due to the obscene inequality between politician's basic salaries and average incomes.

A famous Danish Cycle Tour racer, whose name must remain nameless here, is putting his name to a range of supermarket, sporting cycling clothing. As it is all jet black one may presume they won't need to re-dress the corpses as they pile up at the funeral parlours. They will be "oven-ready" so to speak. So that's all right then, just as we go into the long, dark winter months. That time of year when many cyclists see [even dirt cheap, ultra-lightweight, brilliant LED] lights as optional. Just as certain others see brakes in much the same <cough> light. Or, rather, lack of it in both cases.

Dim bulbs the lot of them. Much like EverReady batteries. Which were often flat before you ever got your hands on them. This led to a multi-trillion, TV advertising campaign for a certain other battery. You know the one which usually came last in most tests of competing and ridiculously cheaper batteries. The advertising in every break, for several decades as I went through a cruelly extended, impressionable age, came as close, as any other, to my wanting to join a lynch mob for advertising executives. Whom I number amongst predatory pedophiles, estate agents, politicians, people traffickers, despots, and all religious leaders, in no particular order.  

Supermarkets often sell a set of [approved] bike lights for about the same price as a couple of "big names" choccy bars or bags of "big names" crisps. They say "you can't put a wise head on young shoulders." Some of them will probably end the winter without any head at all! At least, judging by the number of idiots riding around in black hoodies without lights after dark. Everybody knows hoodies aren't cycling fashion. Except for crash test dummies.

Gloves are unfashionable too it seems. You would not believe the sheer number of young scooterists you see riding along the country roads. With one hand in their jacket pocket and the other frozen solid[ly] to the throttle grip.

Now I'd better go for an autumnal walk before I get into any more trouble. I walked to the village and back in quiet conditions. Only three drivers risked my life on a blind bend. While the owner of a rag-top Mercedes sports car had fallen <cough> fast asleep with their elbow and chin resting on the windowsill. To the young woman commuter who just missed me: No I don't want to have your babies. I hardly know you! And, it was our first [and nearly last] date.

In breaking news: The EU has banned most vacuum cleaners from heavy metal rock concerts. Fortunately for metal fans Whirlpool washing machines are still alloud.[sick] Vestas wind energy and Tesla are getting together to store wind power. It would have been infinitely better to have had consumers store that energy in their private electric cars. But the Danish government has deliberately priced electric cars well beyond reach of all but Danish [coal] millionaires.

A Dutch firm is investing £160 million fitting solar panels to low income homes in the UK. Gravely Blighted's ex-Etonian toffs had deliberately ensured that the feed-in tariff was set too low to allow other than the middle classes to benefit from small scale solar.

Funnily[?] enough Denmark seems to have similar ex-Etonians in charge when it comes to handing out fat, solar tax breaks to the middle classes. Who did so well out of the income from the energy they generated that they could repay their 100% loans to install the panels on their coach houses and gazebos and still be in the black within 3 years! This at a time of minus returns on savings? A "nice little earner" denied to the poor. Shouldn't this be called "corruption?"

The Chinese energy minister is visiting Denmark to discuss energy alternatives leading to potential investments in the billions. I just pray the Chinese don't notice the total absence of electric cars and solar panels on ordinary houses when they do "the sights." Perhaps they'll do a <cough> lightning installation of panels on HC Anderson's house? Then tell the Chinese a load of <cough> porkies [fairy tales] about their <cough> green credentials. Just nobody mention Poland. Which is rapidly felling its last heritage forests to supply wood chips to the few Danish power stations which don't burn coal.  

Late morning ride to the shops. If any vehicle was keeping to the speed limit it certainly wasn't obvious. Plans to build a trout farm on the frequently flooded section of the newly resurfaced road have had to be abandoned due to winter salting. So they looked at a possible salmon farm but the 150% EU funding just wasn't there.

It seems the Danish public water suppliers have been ignoring the testing for past farming toxins simply because they were banned years ago. Of course it takes time to trickle down from the farmer's fields to the deep wells, but somehow they had never thought about it. Dugh?

The BBC is headlining on the attempted theft of a £22,000 watch from a footballer I had never heard of. Seventeen BBC sports "commentators" are credited with the story. £22,000? Isn't that the current average price of a season ticket? What's all the fuss?

A British Cycling magazine has got into trouble for labelling a picture of a lady cyclist "a token attractive woman." What would they have called me? "A token old fart on a tricycle?" 😉

Talking of which: The Overboard "saddlebag" is proving very useful. It has taken a little time to perfect my loading technique but there is almost no damaged shopping so far. I found a draining board tray in plastic yesterday but couldn't make up my mind on which colour to buy. [Imelda Syndrome!] I think a cut down tray would be ideal to support the Overboard bag where it overhangs the Trykit rack shelf. I still haven't remembered to keep my camera out to show the bag when fully loaded. It usually sits in a protective plastic case in the bag.

17 miles today, going quite well again. Keeping up a high cadence helps. Not sure the high "cadence" on the blog is such a good idea. ;-)

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30th August 2017 Oh, the shame!! 😞

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Wednesday 30th 60F, 16C, heavy overcast, rain arriving possibly with heavy thunderstorms. I only made a few hundred yards along the road before the rain started seriously. Quick, about turn and retraced my steps. A wet and windy day ensued but no thunder was involved. I hardly stepped outside.

Thursday 31st 54F, 12C, heavy overcast with yet more rain. I was just reading about a young, world traveler who felt very restless on his return. It seems this is also a common complaint amongst athletes who end their active careers. Finally, I have an excuse for my feelings of emptiness when I didn't have a ride every day. Tricyclist's PTSD can be hell! 😉 And, hopefully, a perfectly valid excuse for all my "little faults."

At least I wasn't let loose on the motorway to ride for miles in the wrong direction. Until the police were forced to use articulated lorries to literally block the road. As happens fairly frequently in Denmark according to the news.

Mostly it is the elderly who get confused by all the flashing headlights. As all those other "idiots" drive the wrong way down the motorway towards them. <sigh> The latest, elderly "ghost driver" didn't even acknowledge the police sirens, horns and flashing blue lights. Let's be careful out there. You never know who you might meet coming the wrong way!

Late ride to the shops under hefty plates of cloud. Looking more like the underside of flying camping mattresses, some were dragging filthy underskirts of cloudbursts. Fortunately this variety went north and west of me. Though others remained threatening all the same. They are still staffing the Danish supermarkets with little kiddies. Which may explain the lack of stock of several standard items.

On the way back a little girl overtook me as I climbed uphill away from my last shopping stop. I swiftly overtook her again but the shame will probably remain with me forever. She didn't even have her feet properly placed on the pedals of her tiny bike as she raced past on the pavement! I could see it was quite deliberate because she was grinning at me as she passed! My only saving grace was that somebody had removed her stabilizers. While I have mine stuck on permanently! Some say that old age is a return to childhood. I can see what they mean. My humour grows more childish [and obscure] every day. Only 7 miles. 

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