20th February 2013: Move along please!!

*

20th 30-32F, -1-0C, windy, overcast, frozen rain falling. It managed quite a blizzard at one point. I did a meandering loop. It felt as if I was riding against the wind most of the time. I was riding on hard packed snow and decided to stop. The front wheel locked instantly and I ended up going off road. I should have released the brakes but wanted to see what would happen. The brakes worked fine on the grass verge. 32 miles.

21st 27F, -3C, overcast, snowing. The forecast is sunny periods. It hasn't stopped snowing since we got up! About an inch of new snow now. Wind chill should be around -12C today except there is no forecast wind. The birches are hardly stirring.

The front tyre is flat again! Is it too much to ask that the UCI crooks ban wheel SWAPPING during a race? Tour de France: Rule 1: Riders repair their own punctures on the side of the roads or give up! That would really concentrate the minds of the thieving crooks at the bicycle tyre hyper-inflation factories! It would concentrate the minds of the team managers too. Tyres are as disposable as bog tissue to the pro teams. Because they never have to be paid for anyway. I bet they throw, or give them away, after every stage. The sponsoring bike tyre manufacturers know this and can make their obscene profits from the naive hordes of copycat weekend warriors. Many bicycle tyres cost far more than car tyres and last a vanishingly small distance compared with car tyres! While they can still get away with their pathetic performance bike tyre manufacturers are laughing all the way to the money launderers.

Fixed two punctured tubes before leaving. I covered much of yesterday's route except the shops were open today. The wind felt bitterly cold on my face today. 27 miles.

22nd 33F, 1C, sunny periods. Just a short run to the shops. What a bunch of crooks some Danish supermarket managers are. A discount is shown in their own weekly special offers comic. Piles of them on the shelf. But no. One may not have the goods at the discount price! The crook had been right through them all and marked them at full price with big orange price labels to avoid any confusion. What part of fraud does he not understand? Going on past form I suppose he could always plead insanity.

I blame the crooks at the supermarket's head offices myself. Their favourite special offer expression is "Flere varianter". Which means several varieties or more varieties (available). This is the supermarket manager's get out clause for any lunatic fantasy which springs to their seriously fevered minds. If the popular item is not actually shown in pictures in their special offers comic then it is never (ever) amongst the "varieties" on special offer. Even though there may only be two variations of the same item being manufactured! Lies, damned lies and supermarkets. Laughing all the way to the money launderers.

In Britain one would only have to ring the Local Trading Standards Office to have a Black Maria carrying an armed response team before you could say; "Show me your several varieties of Heinz Baked Beans, please." Even threatening the shop with the TSO usually brought instant respect for the customer in the former absence of any retail justice at all.

In Denmark there are no trading standards offices nor even officers. No trades description act. No sale of goods act. Shelf pricing, bar codes and till prices are often in parallel universes. Point out the shop's errors to the staff and there is no Danish word for, "Sorry!" As in: "I was only trying to rip you off." It is the sole responsibility of the customer to know what is going on. The Danish Minister of Marmite even managed to ban many vitamin supplements and cut taxes on sugar and saturated fat! This is called leading from the top. (of the food chain)

It was bitterly cold riding downhill at 25mph on the way home. That would make the wind chill at least -25-28C. Am I having fun yet? 13 miles.

23rd 30F, -1C, overcast, light snow falling sideways. We were promised sunshine! Where do I queue for my refund? The tyres are still up. I think the holes caused by previous flints gather sand and more flints. The supposedly  protective strip is itself punctured. All protection is gone at that point. The bike shed has risen to 29F, -1C. It feels more like -10C out there! We are promised positive temperatures in a week. That's what they promised a week ago. I want my promised Global Warming and I want it now! Brrr.

It seems the lunatics manager's interpretation of basic Danish really was at odds with the managers at other branches. At other branches there were plenty of the discounted goods I wanted to buy yesterday at the discounted price. No sign of the lunatic's orange labels. Nor any problems at the tills.

So now the lunatic can safely defraud the manufacturer, as well as the customer. By selling their specially discounted products at full price. Not only has he defrauded the customer and the manufacturer but he has left the customer with a nasty taste in the mouth about that particular food manufacturer. Who was only offering a discount on its products in the vain hope of attract the customer's attention and loyalty to its products and name.  Barmpot-Crooked Manager 1. Manufacturers and Customers United 0.

13 more miles pursuing special offers (and retailing normality) far and wide. It was horribly cold on my face in the wind again. I wish I could wear a ski mask but I might be taken for a terror wotsit on a tricycle. I have more than enough problems as it is. :-)

24th 31F, 0C, overcast, snowing gently, windy to 25mph gusts. The trees are in constant motion. It was too windy and unpleasant to go far. 7 miles.

25th 33F, +1C, overcast, windy. There was another 1-2" of new snow yesterday evening. Much of the old snow was thinning anyway so it hasn't had much impact. Strong, cold headwind going. Better on the way back. Climbing well. Lots of illegally fast, moving traffic. The roads were in a dreadful state. With cracks and potholes everywhere. 19 miles.

*