6.11.2021 Cop-out 2.7C flops as see-through, hot air balloon sinks beneath the rising waves.

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Saturday 6th 47F, leaden overcast with a promise of wind and rain later. At least I won't be troubled by a blinding, low sun. As I walk against the constant flow of crash test dummies. 

Today's Saturday traffic was light but the rain was heavy. I kept my hood up and plodded on.

Have you heard the joke about Cop-out 2.7C? Seriously? Is there anything amusing about the whole charade? The only serious CO2 capture in Glasgow would be to seal all their windows and doors. Keep them there until they save OUR planet from their pollution.  

"Keep the engine running James! I'll need to make a quick getaway as soon as the photo ops are over."

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5.11.2021 Beware of AI "hit man" clones masquerading as zombie Twirlies!

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Friday 5th 36-52F, clear. Sunshine is threatened. A walk is indicated and was completed in blinding sunshine. The sun being at just that height to clear the roadside hedges. Somehow I snapped a pair of tweagles soaring [unseen by me] over a local ridge.

Having to renew my Broxit passport online has raised some serious issues. Somebody had replaced the former, extra mature, but still handsome, young, "professor type." Whose likeness was subtly depicted on my last passport. 

I have somehow been substituted with an antique clone. One which had obviously been subjected to much abuse and carrying a considerable excess of "patina!"

Worse than that: The clone looked like the worst kind of criminal hard case. The deranged psycho glared back at me from the screen. Slit eyed, head tilted menacingly sideways. Unblinking in the unaccustomed, harsh, winter sunlight. Suggesting that "the perp" was caught by the prison, security cameras. Five minutes after release. On license, from a multiple life sentence in a maximum security wing. As the only survivor of a sudden outbreak of cannibalism after the guards flatly refused to enter! 

All was made much, much worse by the absence of a professional haircut/trim for well over two years and counting. I am, alas, a martyr to Covid Hair. [Google spelling checker doesn't recognize Covid? Seriously?] Then it would be a complete waste of time searching for "a home made Mullet."

I spent hours in sickly sunshine on Wednesday. Desperately trying to capture a flattering likeness of this [new] old [substitute] fart. It hardly seems worth mentioning that it was all without the slightest degree of success. 

I had my camera on a tripod and used a 4 second, shutter delay. While I dashed back and forth [repeatedly] to my spot marked with a fallen twig. Such that there is now a newly worn strip of what we laughingly refer to as "that bit of lawn." You will not be surprised to learn that I had to recharge the camera batteries twice. Meanwhile, the length of lining paper. Which I had stapled to the shed wall as a suitably plain backdrop. Became ever more limp.

Fortunately a sympathetic, professional photographer took pity on my pidgin Danish cry for help. In mere moments, the following morning, they had saved the day. By some unfathomable miracle and not a little, well-honed skill, the [hit man] clone was duly transformed. Into a passing resemblance to a [very] long retired, but [probably] quite harmless, Twirly. No plastic surgery required.

Though, sadly, they could not lower the highlights on the septuagenarian's, bulging bonce. And no, I do not want any sarky comments about Dan Dare's arch enemy, The Mekon! I tend more towards magenta rather than green.

Modesty prevents me from sharing any of my hideous, DIY, self-portrait snaps. Nor even the international, emergency rescue, "makeover." My main difficulty was that post processing is not allowed on digital passport photos. Otherwise I could have coloured in the stubbly, grey bits. With a great big dollop of the "Blonde Rinse" button. Followed by an infill  wash of "Cheap Fake Tan" using free, image handling software. I had rather fancied myself as a faded Van Gogh. Recuperating after a fortnight's debauchery on The Med amidst sunflowers. Alas, it was not to be "at my own hand."

Nobody with an ounce of empathy would have noticed my subtle computer aided subterfuge. Except for that tyrannical, AI robot at UK Passport HQ. Which judged my own self portraits as "COLOURFUL BUT DOWNRIGHT POOR! While the pro's effortless artwork was rated as "extremely good."  So much for 60 years of practicing amateur photography! Emphasis on "practicing." Sixty years sounds like a very long time. Was I even there? 

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4.11.2021 Cop-out 2.7C. Boris + Bidenz = 2.7C!

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Thursday 4th 42-45F, heavy overcast, misty and raining. Expected to continue wet for most of the day. It did.

The rain pattered on my hood as I tried to avoid the crash test dummies offering free pedestrian washes. The mist became much thicker and highly variable during my 45 minute walk. Fortunately I had washed and reproofed my winter coat with Storm Eco. The surface of the cotton hardly showed any sign of wetness. An excellent result! All without the slightest hint of the clamminess associated with obscenely pricey, man-made materials.

Hybrids are worse than internal combustion cars. Fact. The US is to subsidize legacy hybrids but not Tesla. Who make all-electric, all American made, safest vehicles on the planet. The entire world's brightest engineers are queuing to work for Tesla. Workers are queuing to get jobs at Tesla. Workers are given stock options. Which have turned some workers into millionaires as Tesla stock rockets in value. 

Legacy ICE makers have corrupt unions who steal their funds. ICE workers become poorer as the US Taxpayer continues to bail out the ICE losers. Remember the massive government [taxpayer] loans which were never paid back by the Big Names in dinosaur technology? 

The same, legacy ICE makers. Who have an annual list of styling iterations. Stretching decades into the future. To match their habitual, annual buyer's need for novelty. If only to confirm parking space hierarchy. The rage for twin arsehole chromed exhausts must be addressed. Which provides for the insanely priced, stainless steel, triangular arseholes in the <cough> "luxury" models. Does anyone else see the irony in decorating the belching chimneys of the Edwardian era, filth-mobiles?

The US media praises ICE and corrupt, legacy ICE vehicle manufactures as if they offered everlasting life. They bad mouth Tesla at every turn. The US and world's media are bought by their heaviest advertisers. Who have no plans to compete against Tesla to produce safe, highly efficient, planet saving, all-electric vehicles. [EVs to the hard of reading.]

Judge a crooked, bought government and its crooked, bought media by its actions. Not by it crooked, bought words. Keep on dozing Biden! The world is far safer while you sleep. Chump and his Fascist Brownshirts are just waiting in the wings. ZZZZZZ.

The UK is to build a new, deep, coal mine. Boris the Clown claims he is not in charge and has no control over the decision. Well let's all be thankful for that! 

Meanwhile Sly "Plague" Jinping worries about teenage behaviour? While the toxic smog kills your forced workers and slaves to dogma and propaganda. Remember to stock up on food this winter. Because yet another communist tyrant couldn't organize an oven in a communist bakery. 

Sly is obviously trying to outdo Mao for the genocide of Chinese citizens. China: Where rewriting history is at the whim of the genocidal, lifetime dictator. Where the false enemies of communism kill none but the tyrant's jackbooted minions kill tens of millions.

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